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Here are the Topics...Check them all out...!
Following are the Quotable Quotes captured at Yale Video. This is a growing list. The first quotes go back 10 years. PLEASE e-mail us your contribution!
1. To be great is to be misunderstood.. 2. My brain is to big for my
body... 3. There`s a little idiot in
every director...(Thom Pratt) 4. Too much is better than too
little, but just a bit!!... 5. Creative juices only leave
stains!... 6. You can see them, but you
can't perceive them... 7. Bill'em Dano!... 8. Ixnay, there's a Ientclay
in the edit bay!... 9. Yes, he's being charged, but
charged nothing!... 10. Their deadlines aren't that
dead!... 11. No corner is too small to
cut!... 12. Video is like diarrhea, they
both have no consistency... 13. I prevent problems before
they happen... I'm a video condom!... 14. Chuck...Chuck...Chuck, you
there?...Chuck... 15. How come it hurts, when I
do this?... 16. Never drink between drinks!... 17. Sure I'll work an extra hour.
If I can have all tomorrow off?... 18. I need it yesterday, and
I have nothing left in the budget!... 19. If it wasn't for the last
minute, nothing would get done!... 20. We should have known when
he showed up for his interview with his fly open... 21. There are no second class
clients, but there certainly are first class clients....... 22. Quick, finish the show, we're at the end of the tape!... (any editor)
23. I'm way over budget, but
I really want to DO this effect... 24. Don't ask for permission.
BEG for forgiveness!... 25. They need to lay-off &
grab? Don't we all... 26. AVID....Non-profit editing
for the 90's... 27. We need to develop a Corporate
Direction! Down is a direction... 28. Abuse equals Love!... 29. I think it needs one more
imperceptible layer.. 30. You can't see the audio!... 31. That's PERFECT....now do
it over!.... 32. "SPEC" is a four-letter-word!..... 33. There is a doppler shift
for everything... 34. "REC IT!"... 35. That which does not kill
us, just kinda pisses us off!.. 36. PRE-READ IT.....AND WEEP!!
37. If they got the dough....we
got the show! 38. Drop-outs in our tapes, are
like flaws in fine leather. 39. Worrying about video, is
like worrying about the defects in the velvet of a velvet painting.
40. This isn't brain surgery,
no one is going to die! 41. I'll make a deal you can't
understand.... 42. We like this kind of work.
So, if we could get to the money, and skip the clients... life
would be perfect! 43. Be nice to receptionists....they
can help you. If they don't like you, they can hurt you... 44. I don't know where we are
going, but we're making good time. 45. Faster, Faster, FASTER.....
no TOO fast! 46. No brains, no headaches!
47. Anger can be a "creative
force" too. 48. If he admitted you were right
on anything, he would have to listen to your advice on everything.
49. It's nice to be needed, but
it is hell to be indispensable!... 50. It isn't wrong, if it's art!
51. (Ray's question) What's up
Mike? 52. I drink...Therefore I pee!
53. "Hummm... it shouldn't
do that!" 54. "Hey stupid! It's time
to pull over & change the air in your head!" 55. Look at how late it's gotten...I've
got nothing done... I might as well go home! 56. What FOOL gave you that price!
57. I don't need another credit
on my resume', I need more zeros in my checkbook! 58. How do I get out of this
business? 59. "Two frame audio desolves?
Pffft...." 60. If you do this one for free...there
is plenty more where that came from! 61. The difference between genius
and idiot, is determined by the number of hours you have been
working! 62. "I'm pink, therefore
I'm spam!" 63. Their deadline was resuscitated!
64. It may be slow, but at least
it's unreliable. 65. Thank God today is Friday,
because if today were Monday, I'd be in deep s_ _t. 66. Does the term "video
asylum" mean anything to you? 67. I've upped my standards,
now up yours! 68. Where there's a wall, there's
a way. 69. We have some great testimonials,
and only a few of them lied. 70. There are "deadlines",
and there are "assassinations"! 71. God invented the future so
we would stick around and see how things turn out. 72. I fought the list, and the
list won! 73. If we knew what we were doing,
we'd be dangerous. 74. Could you take the CROME
down on that? 75. I'd rather see my sister
in a whorehouse, than my brother in video. 76. Anyone who buys a video camera....
deserves it! 77. You never know the true joy
of producing a video until you're done.... and then it's too
late. 78. You have a creative permit,
not a creative license! 79. Any two shots go together with dissolve. (Pepe Lobo) 80. When in doubt, cut to a slo-mo of birds flying. (Pepe Lobo) 81. Just when I thought I was
out, they pulled me back in! 82. The Truth, although interesting, is irrelevant. (Burt Yale) 83. A producer who thinks logically,
is a nice contrast to the real world. 84. In Hollywood, "one thing leads to nothing." (Pepe Lobo) 85. I may not be much, but I'm all I think about. (Dan M.) 86. In this town, all it takes to be a Producer is a business card. (Al Moore) 87. I've seen the future, and I can't afford it. (Anonymous) 88. Warning, objects on the calendar are closer than they look. (Mike Pearce) 89. Why does it seem like more than half of the producers in the world are below average? (Marty Siegall) 90. Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. (Burt Yale) 91. Avoid the inference of acceptance. (Joe) 92. If it makes profit, groovy! Otherwise don't bug me. (Mike Nelson) 93. Yes, John! I wanted "picture" with that large format VHS audio tape. (R. Basil) 94. If I remain this busy I'm bound to lose a chunk of my colon. (R. Basile) 95. No, not 1.4 thousand elements in that folder! There's 1.4 MILLION elements. (Joe D.) 96. Why should I care what I am doing? Everybody else is for me. (Anonymous) 97. It ain't life. It's just advertising. (Simone) 98. From an editor P.O.V., it's really hard to put together a show when you don't have all the pieces. (Bruce on solutions) 99. I can sure work that hoe-thing. (Sue Saffell) 100. I'm an artist not a gardener, damn it. (Richard Morton, Digital Artist)
THE TOP TEN LIES EDITORS TELL
CLIENTS TOP TEN LIES CLIENTS TELL
THEIR EDITOR TOP TEN LIES EDITORS TELL
OTHER EDITORS
In the beginning was The Plan. And the Editors spoke amongst themselves saying, "The Plan is a crock of sh_t, and it stinketh." And the Editors went to their scheduler and said, "The Plan is a pile of dung, and none may abide by the odor thereof." And the scheduler went unto the Account Executive saying, "The Plan is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide by its strength." And the Account Executives spoke amongst themselves saying one to another, "The Plan contains that which aids plant growth. It is very strong." And the Account Executives went unto the company President saying, "The Client's Post Production Plan promotes growth and is very powerful." And the President went unto the Client saying, "This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigor of the project, with powerful results." And the Client then looked upon the Plan and saw that it was good. And The Plan was left on the schedule boards. And that is how sh_t happens!
In prison, they spend the majority
of their time in a 8-by-10 cell. In prison, they get three free
meals a day. In prison, they get rewarded
with time off for good behavior. In prison, there is a dress standard,
but they supply the clothes. In prison, a guard locks and
unlocks all the doors for them. In prison, they can watch TV
and play games. In prison, they will be encouraged
to learn a new career. In prison, they have an exercise
room that they can use almost anytime. In prison, they can fall asleep
anytime and nothing happens. In prison, all expenses are paid
by the tax payer.
How many producers does it take
to change a light bulb? How many lead actors does it
take to change a lightbulb? How many directors of photography
does it take to change a lightbulb? How many Teamsters does it take
to change a lightbulb? How many sound mixers does it
take to change a lightbulb? How many Online editors does
it take to change a lightbulb? How many Offline editors does
it take to change a lightbulb?
Heaven and
Hell? The producer looked through the pearly gates and he say everything he expected, the golden paved streets, everyone kind of hanging out not a care to their exsistence. Time passed at just the right pace. Then St. Peter told the producer it was time to look at Hell. Suddenly the producer found himself looking through the gates of hell and he was surprised. There before his eyes was a beautiful place. The devil himself offered the producer one of those frozen drinks with an umbrella. It was peaceful and much like heaven, time seemed to pass effortlessly. He noticed that everyone there had every wish granted without hesitation. Admittedly the producer was impressed. Again, St. Peter appeared and wisked the producer back to the pearly gates. At this time he told the producer it was time to choose. The producer confessed that both were great but Hell was a lot better than he had ever anticipated. He even saw some old friends in Hell having a great time. So he chose Hell. St. Peter said okay and suddenly the producer was back at the gates of Hell. But this time the view was very different it was hotter than the producer thought possible and flames were everywhere. People were screaming and begging for relief. The devil approached and the producer looked at him and said, "Wait a minute, I was just here and what I saw was nothing like this." The devil looked him square in the eye and said, "Yeah, that was just our demo reel."
1. Thou shalt not linger too long in black, lest thy viewer kick his set reproachfully, thinking it hath conked out again. 2. Thou shalt not use old cassettes. 3. Honor thy vectorscope and thy waveform monitor, for thou art guided by them. 4. Thou shalt not covet thy scene transition for the sake of vanity, but thou shalt cut with reason and purpose, and only then, keeping thy transitions modest. 5. Thou shalt have thy proper subject on screen at the proper time, thy speaker when he speaketh, thy reactor when he reacteth, thy glance and then thy object. 6. Thou shalt not cross the axis. 7. Cast down thy recording tabs and breaketh them, and loggeth thee thy master tapes, and with labels shalt thee cover them, their nakedness is sinful. 8. Thou shalt rehearse thy edits, and giveth them bountiful pre-roll, lest ye recieveth thy glitch. 9. Thou shalt not leave thy decks in pause too long. 10. Thou shalt not forget to bill the client. |